All

From a Japanese Christmas card:

In this peace­ful sea­son, in these beau­ti­ful days, I de­cide to pre­sent you with my heartly miss and suit­able bless.

I’m the Laura Ingalls Wilder of non­sen­si­cal analo­gies.

I have the hunger of one thou­sand tiny men, each one thou­sand times smaller than an or­di­nary man.

If I be­came a pi­rate in India, I would call my­self, “Jolly Rajah”.

I knew you cared, I just did­n’t know how much.

Everyone ig­nores the first “R” in “February”. I like to add one to make up for it. Frebruary.

Million-dollar idea: kan­ga­roo pants